Nora Malone
Editor
As the second quarter begins, changes to the schedule are still on their way. A new proposal has been given to the School Board by a passionate group of students who believe that the best way to support students is to provide them with a 74-minute block to do what is essential— starve and forget.
“I feel like with the shortened lunch period we have now, students are unable to do everything that they need to do,” said the leader of the group, junior Raven Sable. “With such a short period, all I do is eat and nothing else.”
The students’ proposal includes a few changes, in addition to the extended time, such as the closure of the library and options for students to be smacked in the back of the head with a large rock, a method that many students adore.
“It was an astounding experience, I couldn’t remember anything. I went into my AP Gov class and didn’t even know what the word government meant. I hope the school provides this option to everyone,” said student Milde Concussion, who also mentioned that the rock was so successful and she didn’t know what bus was hers at dismissal and somehow ended up in DC, “There was an Amber Alert about it,” she added, and gave the overall experience a 10/10.
“I spend my whole lunch period thinking about my classes.There’s no time for me to forget what I’ve learned,” said Mal Nourishment, a senior and member of the advocacy group.
The proposal was received well by School Board Members, who all jointly released a statement of their support.
“We applaud these students for taking such initiative. The issues students have been facing have been almost unknown to the board, and we want to work with these scholars to bring a new face to Alexandria City High School,” they stated
The campaign began earlier this year, starting with posters advertising an interest meeting for people who “want to work together to create a new ACHS lunch system, the right way.”
The group comprises almost 50 students, and its membership spans across all ACHS campuses.
The group feels there is too much of a focus on their rival group, the Lunch and Learn advocates, whose ideas, says Nourishment, “are against all our beliefs.”
Falen Downs, a freshman at the Minnie Howard Campus, feels that students from all grades should be involved. “I never experienced Lunch and Learn, but that doesn’t mean I don’t know what’s good for me and what’s not. I spend too much of my day learning and snacking; I want 74 minutes to do anything but that.”
“The idea that we are expected to spend our free time eating and educating ourselves is ridiculous and unhealthy for the student body,” said Sable. “Students need time to rot away, [with] stomachs and brains empty.”
Including Starve and Forget’s plans to close the library and offer students the option to be hit on the head with rocks, the group suggests students also take the initiative to bang their heads on their desks to forget the information they just learned.
“It’s vital that students are allowed to use this time for their good and use whatever resources work best for them,” said parent sponsor Cal Downs.
The students plan to stage a walkout during an upcoming lunch period where they will spend all of the period refusing to eat their lunches and practicing forms of hypnosis to forget their classes.
“We want to get the school’s attention,” said Sable. “Our proposal is what’s best for the students, and the administration needs to acknowledge that. We will not rest until every student at this school is ravenous and scatterbrained.”
Graphic by Nora Malone for Theogony
